Popularity

     What does it take to be popular?? Obviously I never did figure out the winning equation because I was never popular. Generally we as a people flock to others who appear successful, or like they got it all figured out. They are popular because their success leaves the rest of us envious and struggling to emulate them so we can be popular too. They exude a confidence we envy. They are funny. They are talented. They appear to enjoy life.



     I skirted the fringes of the in crowd while in school . My mom was delusional in those days because she thought I was popular due to the fact that no matter where we went, everyone would say hello to me. Just because people are friendly and say hello, doesn’t make them your bosom friends…and it sure doesn’t make you part of the “in” crowd. Even I had enough brains to figure that out.

     Perhaps it was my personality that kept me apart. Most likely it was the fact that I just didn’t get the popular kids and their tendency to act like their $hit smelled just a tad sweeter than most. That attitude never impressed me much and still doesn’t. I wasn’t impressed with people who got their jollies over torturing someone or having a laugh at someone’s expense. Why?? To often I was the tortured one. I knew what it was like to be an outcast and I had no intention of treating others the way I had been treated . I knew exactly what it felt like to be invisible. I was invisible. Still am, and I am good at it! 

     Still like any other teenager I longed for popularity. I longed to be accepted. I was like many who tried to be like the others, but since I simply wasn’t like them…I failed miserably. I wasn’t one of the beautiful people. I didn’t have the look. I didn’t act cool. I didn’t know the right things to say. No matter how hard I tried…I couldn’t impress the beautiful people enough to accept me into their group. Sure I was involved in a lot of things in school which put me into the radar of the beautiful people, but it still never made me one of them. Looking back, I realize now that if I simply let the real me emerge things might have been a little different because now I tend to have more confidence than I ever thought of having back then. May the real Kathy now stand up! Yes, that is me…the giggling one jumping up and down waving my hands.

      The older you get you realize in the big scheme of things all people essentially are the same. We all are born, put our pants on the same way, and ultimately die. If only we could learn from birth the notion that if you are kind to others, they will be kind in return and everyone is a potential friend!! Wouldn't that be great?? Then many people would never experience teasing and ridicule, only love and acceptance.   Maybe then there would be no popularity issues and everyone would be truly equal living happily ever after as friends as G0d intended. Still on the other hand, everyone is magically different...and I would rather be me than anyone else for the sake of popularity.  Let's face it, if you are popular for some fake persona you project to the world, the prize isn't nearly as sweet.   Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.