Loved ones are the people you hold most dear in your lives. They may be your friends or your family. They are your everyday support system and help you navigate life through the valleys and the high points. They love you unconditionally, no matter what. They are there for you. They make life worth living. In my life few have held the exalted position of being termed as loved ones. At this point my husband and two children top the list. They are the loves of my life. Without them, my life wouldn’t be complete. Without them, my Christmas wouldn’t be merry and bright.
Sometimes the people that fall in that classification include a close knit group of friends. They take over where the biological family fails and become as treasured as if they had always been there. They are the chosen ones, not the family we were born into that we had no choice over.
Sadly people come and go throughout a person’s lives. Even loved ones evolve and pass from this life onto the next. Even more sad, oftentimes the biological family you are dealt in life turn out to be on the same page as your enemies. Even though they should by all rights be amongst your loved ones, they are not. They join the group of those people who make it their number one priority to make your life a misery. You find yourself wishing the world would stop and let them off. If people were truly honest, they would admit that every family has at least one troublemaker who makes life difficult for everyone else.
No matter whom you count as the most near and dear to your heart, without these precious people, life would lose its luster. In the song titled “The Twelve Days of Christmas”, the two turtle doves that represent our loved ones make up a powerful and essential component of Christmas. It is little wonder they are included in the song considering all they symbolize. Love makes life worthwhile not only on Christmas, but on everyday throughout the year. That is all I have to say until the next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
I have been the wife of an over the road truck driver most of my married life. I can honestly say even all these years later, his homecomings are still a time of celebrationand jubilation. You would think we would be used to his absences by now. In a sense we are. I know it is his job. The kids accept the fact that Daddy is on the road so the bills can get paid. We all accept that he absolutely loves what he does or he would do something else. Unfortunately his job requires being gone most of the time. You can’t make money staying at home. Even though his absence is a fact of life, I still miss him. I miss having him around. The kids miss their Daddy.
So when that shiny semi truck finally backs into the driveway we are overcome with our jubilation. The kids and I rush out onto the lawn in eager anticipation to watch him turn down our road. We jump up and down and wave. As soon as that truck is parked, the door is flung open and we are there to greet him with hugs and kisses.
Even the dogs celebrate to the point I have to hook them up outside or put them in the garage so my husband can even get into the house. As soon as the garage door is opened it is like igniting an explosion of dogs. They rush in barking and jumping. Their tails practically wag off, and they jump on my husband licking him. I make sure a tall glass of iced tea is always waiting. As soon as my husband has taken up his place in the recliner, all three dogs struggle to find a place on his lap. They simply can not contain themselves!! The kids’ take turns showing Daddy all the school work they have done while he was away and catching him up on what was built with LEGOS or what pictures were colored in their color books. It is almost as if we rush to tell him and show him everything he has missed in the first half hour for fear if we don’t he will vanish again.
Usually he is only gone 2-3 weeks and then we are granted a reprieve and he comes home. The last time I saw the whites of his blue eyes was after Thanksgiving. I won’t see him again until when he comes home for Christmas. By then my little family will have more to celebrate than Christmas. By then, we will be primed for a full blown celebration because my husband will finally be home!! The time will speed by, and before we know it he will be gone again. Until then though, we will celebrate. We will enjoy his presence, and we will count our blessings! Blessings always seem more abundant when he is safely at home. I am so thankful that his company ensures that all drivers go home for Christmas!! That is all I have to say until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
Have you ever sat down and thought about what you wanted to accomplish before you kicked the bucket?? Would you like to go skydiving, ride a bull, climb a mountain, love deeper, and try to make peace and forgive those you hadn’t before? Seeing my mom die at the age of 51 and my dad at 65, the ole bucket list has a little more meaning for me because mine includes all the things that the two of them missed out on through no fault of their own. It woke me up to the reality of how precious and short life is. If they hadn’t died so young I probably wouldn’t have had such an insight into this topic and realized that a lot of what is on my own bucket list was on theirs as well. I want to live each day knowing that maybe not today, but maybe tomorrow I can!
I want to see both my kids grow up, marry, and have kids of their own settled and happy. I want to enjoy the overwhelming happiness of being the mother of the bride and groom. I look forward to gaining another son and daughter on the day of their marriages and welcoming them with open arms into the family. I want to hold each of my grandchildren, cherish them, and spend as much time with them as I can. Ideally I would love to see them grown and married pursuing their own lives with vigor. I want to see all the little things that matter most, and be there for the special moments of their lives from graduations to weddings. I want to be there to celebrate with them and comfort them in their times of sorrow. I want my kids, their significant others, and my grandkids to congregate at my house for good ole fashion family reunions filled with laughter and tons of food at every major holiday. I want them to never doubt for one millisecond how much I truly love them.
I would like to see a day when all the bills are paid up to date and I still have money in my pocket. Even though I know my bill collectors wouldn’t know how to act if they couldn’t harass me for money, I might just miss telling them when they threaten collection that I’ve been there and done that. It would be a hardship for them not to have the privilege of winning a free bushel of horse $hit for their trouble or the pleasure of me encouraging them to kiss it. I wish a day would come when my husband wouldn’t have to work so hard, and I could spend most of my days at his side. I would give anything if he could be home more and we still would be able to pay bills and enjoy life. That doesn’t figure in very well when you are paid by the mile and you love to drive a semi truck. If that truck isn’t rolling, there is no money to be had.
I want to be able to explore the world with my little family. If not Europe and the Caribbean, then Disney World and some of the great travel hot spots in the United States. I want to be able to use my camper as a means of lodging while we travel cross country exploring all the beauty I can find. Since I haven’t been anywhere in years, going any place would be welcome. I love to explore!! I want to make memories with my husband and kids that I can cherish for the rest of my life and document in pictures.
Most of all I want to live a life filled with laughter. Instead of my cup running over with sadness, I prefer overflowing with happiness. I would accept the daily challenge to find the blessings in each day and be thankful for each one no matter how small and insignificant. A big one on my bucket list is to know deep in my heart when I do die that my family know without a doubt how much I cherished each of them and enjoyed the wild ride of life at their side. That is all I have to say until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
This Thanksgiving I am so thankful for the things I have in my life. I choose not to agonize over the things I don’t. It would be so easy to lose myself in the depths of despair over the fact that my parents are no longer alive to celebrate with or that money is in short supply. I may not have all I want, but I have all I need.
It seems life is never easy, but I get G0d’s purpose for life’s struggles. He wants us to depend on Him for strength, be thankful to Him for all blessings no matter how small, and value the priceless things in life that can never be replaced. Therefore I am thankful that unlike last year, my husband will be home for Thanksgiving. I am thankful everyday for the companionship and devotion of my children who march through life at my side. I am thankful that except for a cold, my family is healthy. I am thankful for a car that runs, a roof over my head, and my dear sweet pets who snuggle against me to keep me warm at night.
I am thankful for the wonderful parents I was blessed to have, and even though they are no longer here I am thankful for the precious memories I have of them. I am thankful that G0d blessed me with the ability to cook and magically create a delicious meal. Even though it would be great to have the newest shiniest SUV to drive, I am thankful I don’t have the hefty payment that would go with it! I am thankful for my blazer and the fact that is paid for. I am thankful for the kind neighbors that have befriended me on both sides making me feel less alone. I am thankful for dear friends, precious memories, and the promise of tomorrow with no mistakes.
I am thankful for the outlet to express myself on this website and those precious folks that read my words, watch the music videos, and in doing so gaze directly into the depths of my soul. I am thankful for the feedback I receive from my readers through their comments. I am deeply thankful for all the friends it has brought my way. Mostly I am thankful to have learned the valuable skill of taking life one day at a time, and learning to laugh, even through my tears. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
Some of my earliest recollections from Thanksgivings past included not just one huge meal, but several. Not only did my mother make a huge spread, but I also had three sets of Grandparents to share Thanksgiving with. Usually, we would have a meal at home that my mother prepared on Thanksgiving day. Then we would travel to each of the grandparent’s homes Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Turkey, turkey, and even more turkey!! By the end of it, you came close to growing feathers and saying “Gobble, Gobble, Gobble!”
Although I have memories of attending the Thanksgiving festivities of all three sets of Grandparents, my dad’s parent’s celebration always stood out. For one thing, there were always a lot more people. I had 5 sets of aunts and uncles at that gathering plus a slew of cousins, with second cousins coming along later on.
On holidays long tables were set up end to end down the center of the living room into the master bedroom with chairs lined up on both sides dominating Grandma‘s farmhouse. Grandma sat on one end of the long table, and Grandpa on the other. Behind Grandpa there was always another table set up in the master bedroom and all the cousins fought to get to sit alone in the bedroom in that special place of distinction.
The table was set with Grandma’s best tablecloths, red and clear glass plates, silverware, and water goblets. When it was time, we would all gather around that massive table and joined hands much like the Who’s down in Whoville singing “Count Your Blessings”. Then Grandpa would lead us all in prayer. Grandpa always mumbled when he prayed and he was so far away that usually I couldn’t make out what he was saying. Somehow you would figure out when he was finished by the loud proclamation of “Amen!! and then we would go single file, out the front door, through the garage, into the kitchen where all the wonderful food awaited. Usually it was always colder than a witches tit in the Klondike outside, and by the time you got back into the house, the heat from the kitchen steamed up your glasses so you couldn’t see three inches in front of your face.
Since I was the youngest, I was always finished eating before anyone else and antsy to get up and run around with my cousin. The only problem with that is that with all the tables and chairs, you couldn’t squeeze a mouse fart out once you were seated. We got around that too by having a merry ole time crawling under the network of tables to wherever we wanted to go.
When everyone was finally finished eating, the women retreated into the kitchen to wash dishes and the men set to work taking down the tables. In their place, a few card tables were erected and quite a few rousing games of Euchre and Yahtzee were played. Sometimes Grandpa would dig out his home movies and the whole family would gather in the living room to watch. Other times, everyone would just visit.
It always amazed me that no matter how many grand kids there were, and there were a G0d’s plenty, Grandma and Grandpa would always give us hugs and kisses when we arrived and when it was time to go home. They had so much love for each and every one of us and instilled in me the importance of family, thankfulness of blessings, G0d, and faith.
Sadly those long lost Thanksgivings are only a memory as many of the key players have passed on from this life. Their smiles and laughter will never be forgotten, and I can still hear the family singing “Count Your Blessings” in my mind. I can only hope that I can instill the same sense of family, love, and tradition in my own children. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a truckers wife.
Get you priorities straight!! Have you ever heard that one before?? Well I have, and it rings through my scattered brain every Friday without fail. Every time Friday rolls around, I get to revisit where my priorities lie. I personally hate Fridays. It is payday, and it is also the day when I have to sit down and figure out to the last penny what will be paid, and what won’t. There used to be a day when we went and got what we wanted and then paid bills with what was left. Sadly those days are gone. Somewhere along the line we became more responsible and kissed the days of living la vita loca goodbye. Bottom line, every decision I make is made with my husband’s input. I may do the math and the organization, but I give him final approval even offering several different scenarios.
When figuring out where the money is going to go, I have to prioritize what is the most important for that week, and what to let slide. For example, you absolutely have to have a place to live. So the house payment trumps just about everything else. The vehicle payment must be paid because you need a mode of transportation. It is a good idea to keep the utilities paid because truly at 34 degrees or lower, who wants to be without heat?? Not I said the frog. My truck driving husband thinks his cell phone bill should trump all because he is on the road and needs it desperately. Actually, I get the necessity of having a cell phone however, T mobile charges one unG0dly amount each month for the privilege of having coverage nationwide, and unlimited everything. His list of priorities definitely differ from mine on that score. While I am rooting for internet, internet, internet so I can update my website, he is moaning cell phone, cell phone, cell phone. When it gets down to it you have to prioritize to ensure you have shelter, warmth, and food for your belly. Anything else is comes after that.
At the end of the day I eventually get it all figured out. If this was a perfect world I would be able to tell you that there is enough money for everything and that everything is paid up to date. Unfortunately, that is just not how life works. I will say that by the time I have decided on a course of action, I stick to it to the letter and usually feel good about what I was able to accomplish.
If you are looking for what my priorities are in general, my kids and husband are number 1. They come first in all instances. Once everyone else has been taken care of, the bills that are going to be paid are paid, and everyone has what they need…then and only then do I worry about me. I will say there are exceptions to that rule too. For example, when “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2” was released on DVD, you can bet I had my happy a$$ at the store picking up my copy as soon as the doors on my son’s bus had closed and the bus was on its way down the road. What can I say? I do have my weaknesses. When it comes to money, every now and then I simply can’t resist a small indulgence. That was one of the rare times I told my husband what I was doing instead of asking his opinion. On the most part we are aligned in our priorities and I think that is why our marriage works. When we stand together, we can accomplish anything. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
As much as I love the Harry Potter books and movies, it is little wonder that the first thing that popped into my head when faced with this weeks blog hop challenge was the mystical mirror of Erised. Harry discovers it in an abandoned classroom in the first installment of the Harry Potter series “The Sorcerer’s Stone”.
All of the inscriptions on the mirror’s frame are inscribed backwards so when reversed it actually reads “I show not your face but your hearts desire”. Even the name of the mirror is actually desire spelled backwards. According to Albus Dumbledore, the headmaster at Hogwarts, the mirror shows only your deepest and most desperate desires of your heart.
As I contemplated the topic more, I wondered to myself exactly what I would see if I happened to peer into the depths of the mirror. What mystery would I uncover?? Would it be obvious, or something I subconsciously desire more than anything else. Deep within my heart, I believe I would be much likeHarry Potter. Although I had the pleasure of knowing and growing up with my family, they have since died. My guess of my deepest heart’s desire would be to be reunited with my family again. Not only reunited, but where they were all happy and whole with no worries and no sickness to plague them. It would show us all together celebrating holidays and life.
It would also be possible for me to see myself being successful doing what I have discovered I love doing best…creating, designing, and writing . In that sense I would see much the same vision that Ron Weasley saw. I would be successful, popular, sought after for my skills, and well loved.
If I really want to delve into my deepest desire…it would be to once again have someone who takes care of me and worries after my welfare much as I always take care and worry about everyone else. Before my parents died, they fulfilled that role in my life. I could always rely on them to be there for me and take care of me. If I was sick, they were there to bring me cold medicine when I couldn’t afford it, make sure I went to the doctor, or when something went haywire with my vehicle they were there to help sort it out. Since their deaths, I have no one to rely on but myself. I desperately miss that care and devotion. I miss the companionship they gave me. I miss them period. If I want a birthday or Christmas present, I have to buy it myself. If I want decorations, I have to put them up. If I want a birthday cake, I must bake it myself. You get the picture. It isn’t quite the same as having someone surprise you.
What do you most desire? Wealth? Love? Fame? Time alone? Family? Albus Dumbledore also stated that the happiest person in the world would see themselves exactly as they are. In my mind, that would be a rare sight indeed. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
“Well color me happy, there is a sofa in here for two!!” When I saw the BFF challenge for this week, that was the first thing that came to mind. The whole concept of appreciating the little things in life with an exuberance of a little kid jumping up and down clapping my hands in glee ! There is nothing better than laughing till my belly aches and tears are flowing down my face until I am choking on myself! I love bouncing on balloons till they bust or mooning someone shamelessly and running away laughing myself silly in my wake! Laughter makes my life sparkle with color and is a very important ingredient to life.
If it weren’t for my husband and children who I hold near and dear to my heart, even the reddest rose would seem as lackluster as a gray dingy gym sock that has visited the washing machine one to many times. The little things in life color my world with happiness! The best times happen when my husband is home. Most of the time, magic happens when we are together. This summer a typical weekend would be spent zooming around the neighborhood with my husband and kids on the golf cart, watching my family zooming around the yard on 4 wheelers squealing in delight, and spending time swimming in the pool. Those weekends were highlighted with barbecues where the whole family gathered around the grill together as whatever succulent meat happened to be on the menu sizzled to perfection. Our laughter rings through out the times we spend together. I can honestly say that there is nothing better than seeing that big purple semi truck backing into the driveway! The kids and I are always out by the road waving him in like a bunch of lunatics!
Whether listening to hard rock, rousing country, or the soothing classics, music colors my life in every emotion from happiness to sadness. I can’t imagine my life without music. I have loaded all my favorite tunes onto my phone and love to let it play non stop in the back ground as I go about my days. Like my husband and children, without music my life would be drained of color. It seems everything goes a lot better with music. I write better, clean faster, concentrate more, and the best perk is my mood is elevated a million times over just with the pounding feel good beats of my favorite tunes blasting in the background.
Since I have been young I have loved all the colors. I see favorites in G0d’s greatest creations: the flowers, the birds and butterflies that flutter through the sky, and the beauty of the bluest oceans waves crashing on lush beaches with the prettiest sunsets in the distance.
Without the love of my husband and children, the best of G0d’s creations, my menagerie of pets, and the music that drives the heartbeat of my life, everything in the world would be drab and grey and lifeless. There are so many blessings to be happy for! Home, health, family, pets, love, music, writing, gorgeous art, and nature! So color me happy!! I am so blessed to appreciate the people and things that make life worthwhile. I intend to keep living my life in full color!! Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
Longing. I have a deep longing for the people who are lost to me. It is an ache I carry with me daily and becomes even more severe on holidays and on special occasions. This deep sense of loss I harbor deep within my soul I try to bury within me. When first faced with this writing challenge, I struggled to write about what I deeply long for and settled instead for another longing which doesn’t even come close to scratching the surface to this one.
Due to recent events, I feel it is best to proceed to write about this longing as a much needed release for my soul. It seems impossible to imagine that it has already been over 18 years since my mom died, and over 7 years since I lost my dad. Since their passing, grandparents , aunts, uncles, and a dear cousin have followed suit. So many familymembers gone! The people that made up the very fabric of my past are gone except for a distant memory and my heart aches for them.
This week my son celebrated his 6th birthday. It was bittersweet for me because neither of my parents ever had the chance to know him. Even sadder, he never had the chance to know them. He has never known the love, affection, and attention Grandparents can give. The grandparents he is left with shun his and my daughter’s existence and completely bypassed his birthday. A blessing of sort is that he didn’t even seem to notice. If my parents would have lived, they would have showered both my children with love. They would have been as proud of them as I am. It is truly their loss.
Griefis a powerful thing that even time can not completely diminish. Life does go on, but memories linger. I miss the family dinners, the laughter, and the feeling of belonging. I miss the opportunities to share the everyday trials and joy of life. I long to do so, but I can’t. I long for the day when I too can go home to heaven and see them once again. I long for the strength and insight to provide my children with all the love and encouragement they need to grow into happy adults. I long for the laughter to overtake me when I am feeling so low. I am thankful for the moments alone to rail, cry, and grieve in private so they will never know the suffering I feel on their behalf. I long to erase the sorrow of what might have been. I will continue to long for what hurts the most, what I can not have. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
Since I was the youngest, I was always finished eating before anyone else and antsy to get up and run around with my cousin. The only problem with that is that with all the tables and chairs, you couldn’t squeeze a mouse fart out once you were seated. We got around that too by having a merry ole time crawling under the network of tables to wherever we wanted to go.
When figuring out where the money is going to go, I have to prioritize what is the most important for that week, and what to let slide. For example, you absolutely have to have a place to live. So the house payment trumps just about everything else. The vehicle payment must be paid because you need a mode of transportation. It is a good idea to keep the utilities paid because truly at 34 degrees or lower, who wants to be without heat?? Not I said the frog. My truck driving husband thinks his cell phone bill should trump all because he is on the road and needs it desperately. Actually, I get the necessity of having a cell phone however, T mobile charges one unG0dly amount each month for the privilege of having coverage nationwide, and unlimited everything. His list of priorities definitely differ from mine on that score. While I am rooting for internet, internet, internet so I can update my website, he is moaning cell phone, cell phone, cell phone. When it gets down to it you have to prioritize to ensure you have shelter, warmth, and food for your belly. Anything else is comes after that.
At the end of the day I eventually get it all figured out. If this was a perfect world I would be able to tell you that there is enough money for everything and that everything is paid up to date. Unfortunately, that is just not how life works. I will say that by the time I have decided on a course of action, I stick to it to the letter and usually feel good about what I was able to accomplish.
If it weren’t for my husband and children who I hold near and dear to my heart, even the reddest rose would seem as lackluster as a gray dingy gym sock that has visited the washing machine one to many times. The little things in life color my world with happiness! The best times happen when my husband is home. Most of the time, magic happens when we are together. This summer a typical weekend would be spent zooming around the neighborhood with my husband and kids on the golf cart, watching my family zooming around the yard on 4 wheelers squealing in delight, and spending time swimming in the pool. Those weekends were highlighted with barbecues where the whole family gathered around the grill together as whatever succulent meat happened to be on the menu sizzled to perfection. Our laughter rings through out the times we spend together. I can honestly say that there is nothing better than seeing that big purple semi truck backing into the driveway! The kids and I are always out by the road waving him in like a bunch of lunatics!
Without the love of my husband and children, the best of G0d’s creations, my menagerie of pets, and the music that drives the heartbeat of my life, everything in the world would be drab and grey and lifeless. There are so many blessings to be happy for! Home, health, family, pets, love, music, writing, gorgeous art, and nature! So color me happy!! I am so blessed to appreciate the people and things that make life worthwhile. I intend to keep living my life in full color!! Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
Longing. I have a deep longing for the people who are lost to me. It is an ache I carry with me daily and becomes even more severe on holidays and on special occasions. This deep sense of loss I harbor deep within my soul I try to bury within me. When first faced with this writing challenge, I struggled to write about what I deeply long for and settled instead for another longing which doesn’t even come close to scratching the surface to this one.
Grief is a powerful thing that even time can not completely diminish. Life does go on, but memories linger. I miss the family dinners, the laughter, and the feeling of belonging. I miss the opportunities to share the everyday trials and joy of life. I long to do so, but I can’t. I long for the day when I too can go home to heaven and see them once again. I long for the strength and insight to provide my children with all the love and encouragement they need to grow into happy adults. I long for the laughter to overtake me when I am feeling so low. I am thankful for the moments alone to rail, cry, and grieve in private so they will never know the suffering I feel on their behalf. I long to erase the sorrow of what might have been. I will continue to long for what hurts the most, what I can not have. Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.